A Clear Sign
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Adoption lingo
Adoption Day: the day you swear to care for and love your child and sign the official adoption papers.
Bio: an abbreviation for "biological"
CCAA: China Center of Adoption Affairs, the governmental agency in China which processes all adoptive families dossiers and all of China's paper-ready orphans including translation, approval, and matching of families to children.
DOR: date of referral.
Dossier: pronounced "doss-ee-ay", a collection or file of documents on the same subject, especially a complete file containing detailed information about a person or topic.
DTC: Dossier To China, this is the date a family's adoption agency mailed their dossier to China
Family Coordinator: the wonderful person at an adoption agency who guides a family throughout the adoption process coordinating all aspects of the adoption, answering questions, praying for and encouraging their families.
Gotcha Day: the day you finally get to meet and hold your child and take him/her with you.
Home Study: A social investigation where a social worker interviews prospective adoptive parents concerning their background and their ability to raise a child. Often this is done in a series of interviews (4 for China), with at least one interview in the home. It can also include information to help an individual or couple to prepare for adoption. Homestudies can become "outdated". There is a time period, usually 18 months, before a homestudy needs to be updated.
I-171H: the approval form you must have from USCIS to adopt a foreign-born child.
LID: Log-In-Date, the date that China received our dossier and logged it into their system; this is a family's spot in the queue at the CCAA
LOA: Letter of Acceptance
LOI: Letter of Intent
"Mei-mei": the Chinese word for "little sister".
PA: Pre-approval.
Paper-chase: the act of gathering up all the paper work that is needed for the dossier.
Paper "pregnancy": the stage of adoption where the parents are gathering all their needed documents for their dossier
Paper-ready: an adjective used to describe an orphan who has been examined and registered with the CCAA to be adopted.
Re-adoption: refers to a process by which a U.S. state court in the state of the parents' or sole parent's, as applicable, residence reviews the details of the adoption abroad along with additional information as it deems necessary, and issues a new adoption decree, independent from the foreign decree, stating that the child has been adopted in conformity with the adoption law of the applicable state. The ultimate purpose is to ensure that your child by adoption is entitled to all of the rights that he or she should have as your child under U.S. federal and state law.
Referral: The information a family receives about their child which includes two 3x5 photos, one passport size photo, a medical report with coinciding lab results and graphs, a growth report and one to two pages of biographical information.
SN: Special Needs, refers to children who are physically, developmentally or emotionally disabled, or an older child who might remain in institutionalized care should no adoptive family be available.
Social orphan: a child whose families cannot care for them due to extreme poverty, abuse, incarceration or abandonment.
SW: Social Worker
TA: Travel Approval, the approval to travel to another country for adoption and the dates you will be there.
True orphan: a child with no parents or extended family to care for them.
USCIS: United States Citizenship and Immigration Services, formerly the INS.
Waiting Children: Another term for children with special needs, especially children who are in need of homes to be adopted into. Also children who are older than five years of age.
Bio: an abbreviation for "biological"
CCAA: China Center of Adoption Affairs, the governmental agency in China which processes all adoptive families dossiers and all of China's paper-ready orphans including translation, approval, and matching of families to children.
DOR: date of referral.
Dossier: pronounced "doss-ee-ay", a collection or file of documents on the same subject, especially a complete file containing detailed information about a person or topic.
DTC: Dossier To China, this is the date a family's adoption agency mailed their dossier to China
Family Coordinator: the wonderful person at an adoption agency who guides a family throughout the adoption process coordinating all aspects of the adoption, answering questions, praying for and encouraging their families.
Gotcha Day: the day you finally get to meet and hold your child and take him/her with you.
Home Study: A social investigation where a social worker interviews prospective adoptive parents concerning their background and their ability to raise a child. Often this is done in a series of interviews (4 for China), with at least one interview in the home. It can also include information to help an individual or couple to prepare for adoption. Homestudies can become "outdated". There is a time period, usually 18 months, before a homestudy needs to be updated.
I-171H: the approval form you must have from USCIS to adopt a foreign-born child.
LID: Log-In-Date, the date that China received our dossier and logged it into their system; this is a family's spot in the queue at the CCAA
LOA: Letter of Acceptance
LOI: Letter of Intent
"Mei-mei": the Chinese word for "little sister".
PA: Pre-approval.
Paper-chase: the act of gathering up all the paper work that is needed for the dossier.
Paper "pregnancy": the stage of adoption where the parents are gathering all their needed documents for their dossier
Paper-ready: an adjective used to describe an orphan who has been examined and registered with the CCAA to be adopted.
Re-adoption: refers to a process by which a U.S. state court in the state of the parents' or sole parent's, as applicable, residence reviews the details of the adoption abroad along with additional information as it deems necessary, and issues a new adoption decree, independent from the foreign decree, stating that the child has been adopted in conformity with the adoption law of the applicable state. The ultimate purpose is to ensure that your child by adoption is entitled to all of the rights that he or she should have as your child under U.S. federal and state law.
Referral: The information a family receives about their child which includes two 3x5 photos, one passport size photo, a medical report with coinciding lab results and graphs, a growth report and one to two pages of biographical information.
SN: Special Needs, refers to children who are physically, developmentally or emotionally disabled, or an older child who might remain in institutionalized care should no adoptive family be available.
Social orphan: a child whose families cannot care for them due to extreme poverty, abuse, incarceration or abandonment.
SW: Social Worker
TA: Travel Approval, the approval to travel to another country for adoption and the dates you will be there.
True orphan: a child with no parents or extended family to care for them.
USCIS: United States Citizenship and Immigration Services, formerly the INS.
Waiting Children: Another term for children with special needs, especially children who are in need of homes to be adopted into. Also children who are older than five years of age.
Labels: adoption terms
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Our family, Mother's Day 2008
Monday, June 23, 2008
The Whole Story, part one
Sometimes when you hear of world happenings, it so affects you that you dwell upon it long after the time you first learned of it.
It was back in high school when I first became aware of China's one-child policy. When I heard of the ways in which this policy was enforced, I felt devastated. Combined with the Chinese cultural preference for boys, my heart truly broke for the women and girls of China.
When Matt and I got married, we both knew we wanted about three kids, maybe four. We were first blessed with Madison in 1996 and then Brevin in 1999.
The idea of adoption came along in an unexpected way. One day I was sitting on a park bench watching Madison play while nursing Brevin and admiring a little Asian girl who was playing and laughing nearby. I commented to Matt about how cute she was, and he responded, "I would be happy to try to give you one of those, Anita, but I just don't think we can make one. I'll be glad to try for the rest of my life, though!" In my attempt for a rebuttal to that, I blurted out, "Well, we could adopt one!"
I'm sure Matt didn't think about it again, and he had no idea of the flood of thoughts he had just loosed within me. All my feelings towards the situation in China came back to me. And I knew that China must have an exorbitant amount of female orphans. I realized that adopting an orphan from China would be a great way to do something to help the social crisis there. I knew I would probably never be a missionary to China nor be able to change the policies there, but I could make a difference in the life of one child.
One day I said to Matt, "You know, we really could adopt a baby from China." To which he replied, "Yeah, right!" As I got him to realize I was serious, he agreed to at least pray about it. I prayed about it as well.
One day I remember in particular, I had spent the morning praying about adopting from China and asking God to show us His will. Afterwards, I took Madison (approx. 5 yrs.) and Brevin (about 2) to the park to play. And there at the playground was a Caucasian woman with her three children: two caucasian and one adopted from China. I was stunned. How many times had I asked for God to just tell me what to do, just send me a FAX or a burning bush? This time He had. This was A CLEAR SIGN.
I continued to pray and think about it as Matt did. When we came back to discuss God's will for our family, we both had to admit that while being open to adoption, we still wanted to have one more biological child. What's truly amazing is that now we know that at the time we weren't even old enough nor did we have enough annual income for an adoption from China.
In 2002, we were blessed with Elijah. I remember that once I had my second boy, I knew that I also wanted another girl. And I began secretly researching China adoptions when Matt wasn't looking. (At this point in our lives, we were living in a 2 bedroom apartment and the idea was totally implausible) When Elijah turned one, we both agreed that we were done having biological children. Matt especially felt that if we were to have more children, it would be better to provide a family to one of the millions of orphans already in the world rather than to bring another child into the world. Though the definite decision to adopt had not been made at this point, I knew Matt was on board and it would only be a matter of time....
It was back in high school when I first became aware of China's one-child policy. When I heard of the ways in which this policy was enforced, I felt devastated. Combined with the Chinese cultural preference for boys, my heart truly broke for the women and girls of China.
When Matt and I got married, we both knew we wanted about three kids, maybe four. We were first blessed with Madison in 1996 and then Brevin in 1999.
The idea of adoption came along in an unexpected way. One day I was sitting on a park bench watching Madison play while nursing Brevin and admiring a little Asian girl who was playing and laughing nearby. I commented to Matt about how cute she was, and he responded, "I would be happy to try to give you one of those, Anita, but I just don't think we can make one. I'll be glad to try for the rest of my life, though!" In my attempt for a rebuttal to that, I blurted out, "Well, we could adopt one!"
I'm sure Matt didn't think about it again, and he had no idea of the flood of thoughts he had just loosed within me. All my feelings towards the situation in China came back to me. And I knew that China must have an exorbitant amount of female orphans. I realized that adopting an orphan from China would be a great way to do something to help the social crisis there. I knew I would probably never be a missionary to China nor be able to change the policies there, but I could make a difference in the life of one child.
One day I said to Matt, "You know, we really could adopt a baby from China." To which he replied, "Yeah, right!" As I got him to realize I was serious, he agreed to at least pray about it. I prayed about it as well.
One day I remember in particular, I had spent the morning praying about adopting from China and asking God to show us His will. Afterwards, I took Madison (approx. 5 yrs.) and Brevin (about 2) to the park to play. And there at the playground was a Caucasian woman with her three children: two caucasian and one adopted from China. I was stunned. How many times had I asked for God to just tell me what to do, just send me a FAX or a burning bush? This time He had. This was A CLEAR SIGN.
I continued to pray and think about it as Matt did. When we came back to discuss God's will for our family, we both had to admit that while being open to adoption, we still wanted to have one more biological child. What's truly amazing is that now we know that at the time we weren't even old enough nor did we have enough annual income for an adoption from China.
In 2002, we were blessed with Elijah. I remember that once I had my second boy, I knew that I also wanted another girl. And I began secretly researching China adoptions when Matt wasn't looking. (At this point in our lives, we were living in a 2 bedroom apartment and the idea was totally implausible) When Elijah turned one, we both agreed that we were done having biological children. Matt especially felt that if we were to have more children, it would be better to provide a family to one of the millions of orphans already in the world rather than to bring another child into the world. Though the definite decision to adopt had not been made at this point, I knew Matt was on board and it would only be a matter of time....
Labels: china adoptions
Sunday, June 22, 2008
The Whole Story, part two
It was nothing short of a miracle! By the end of 2004, Matt's income had almost doubled at Dealer Fusion. He had also begun his business with World Financial Group. We were living in a bigger home, and I no longer had to research adoption "in secret".
Yet the cost was still daunting. While we were renting a more comfortable home and had less monthly financial strain, we did not have anything saved. But God had always taken care of us, and we'd gone through very difficult times when Matt had been in ministry living on a "faith" budget for almost...well, our whole marriage minus one year. We told ourselves, "If God is leading us to do this, then God will provide."
Since Elijah was now about 2 1/2, we knew that it was time to really decide about whether to have another child. One day I typed "Christian adoption" into Google. There were a lot of listings, but one certain ad in the sidebar caught my eye. It was America World Adoption Agency (AWAA). I clicked on it right away and I just knew that this was the right agency for us. I saw an endorsement by Steven Curtis Chapman on the home page, and it was such an encouragement to see that he and his wife had adopted from China after having a biological daughter and two sons just as we did. On the website there was a place to send for an information packet, which I did, and then there was a listing of upcoming adoption seminars. There was one scheduled in Southern California that very weekend. It happened to be at a church in Manhattan Beach which Matt had been extremely close to being hired at for the youth pastor position about 4 years prior. I called our neighbors to see if they were free to watch the kids, which they were, and we were on our way.
The night before the seminar, Matt got a call from Dealer Fusion: he was being given a new territory to oversee with a $5,000/yr raise! This was another CLEAR SIGN.
I probably don't need to say that the seminar was just what we needed. We got to meet a regional public relations rep from AWAA who shared his adoption story and how God provided for that. We got to meet another couple with their baby who had just returned from China and hear how amazing that had been. Both of these families had biological children before adopting. We were impressed with the video we saw of the director of AWAA and his heart for orphans and adoption. We got the information on the cost breakdown and many available ways in which to cover the cost--cost seems to be the one issue for every adoptive couple. We also found out that we met the requirements for China adoption (this was before the China Center of Adoption Affairs added the "net worth" requirement). When we got home from the seminar, the information packet had arrived in the mail. We were so impressed by AWAA.
Now that we had an agency chosen, we decided to take two weeks to pray again before beginning to step forth. This is what we heard:
And what are the ways* of the Lord?
Yet the cost was still daunting. While we were renting a more comfortable home and had less monthly financial strain, we did not have anything saved. But God had always taken care of us, and we'd gone through very difficult times when Matt had been in ministry living on a "faith" budget for almost...well, our whole marriage minus one year. We told ourselves, "If God is leading us to do this, then God will provide."
Since Elijah was now about 2 1/2, we knew that it was time to really decide about whether to have another child. One day I typed "Christian adoption" into Google. There were a lot of listings, but one certain ad in the sidebar caught my eye. It was America World Adoption Agency (AWAA). I clicked on it right away and I just knew that this was the right agency for us. I saw an endorsement by Steven Curtis Chapman on the home page, and it was such an encouragement to see that he and his wife had adopted from China after having a biological daughter and two sons just as we did. On the website there was a place to send for an information packet, which I did, and then there was a listing of upcoming adoption seminars. There was one scheduled in Southern California that very weekend. It happened to be at a church in Manhattan Beach which Matt had been extremely close to being hired at for the youth pastor position about 4 years prior. I called our neighbors to see if they were free to watch the kids, which they were, and we were on our way.
The night before the seminar, Matt got a call from Dealer Fusion: he was being given a new territory to oversee with a $5,000/yr raise! This was another CLEAR SIGN.
I probably don't need to say that the seminar was just what we needed. We got to meet a regional public relations rep from AWAA who shared his adoption story and how God provided for that. We got to meet another couple with their baby who had just returned from China and hear how amazing that had been. Both of these families had biological children before adopting. We were impressed with the video we saw of the director of AWAA and his heart for orphans and adoption. We got the information on the cost breakdown and many available ways in which to cover the cost--cost seems to be the one issue for every adoptive couple. We also found out that we met the requirements for China adoption (this was before the China Center of Adoption Affairs added the "net worth" requirement). When we got home from the seminar, the information packet had arrived in the mail. We were so impressed by AWAA.
Now that we had an agency chosen, we decided to take two weeks to pray again before beginning to step forth. This is what we heard:
"Look at the new thing I am going to do. It is already happening. Don't you see it? I will make a road in the desert and rivers in dry land." (Isaiah 43:19)
"Children are a gift from the Lord, they are a reward from Him.... How happy is the man whose quiver is full of them! He will not be put to shame when he confronts his accusers at the city gates." (Psalm 127:3,5)
"How happy are those who fear [respect and revere] the Lord--all who follow his ways*! You will enjoy the fruit of your labor. How happy you will be! How rich your life! Your wife will be like a frutiful vine flourishing within your home. And look at all those children! There they sit around your table as vigorous and healthy as young olive trees. That is the reward for those who fear Him." (Psalm 128:1-4)
And what are the ways* of the Lord?
"His unchanging plan has always been to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ." (Ephesians 1:5a)On Father's Day, 2005, we submitted our adoption application to America World!
